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Mildew

July 13, 2010

My papa (dad’s father) has a girlfriend, we don’t like her.  We call her Mildew.  I don’t normally talk about other people on my blog but considering that she asked me last night how I develop my film from my digital camera, I highly doubt that she’s going to hop online and find my blog.

That being said, Mildew does and says some really strange things.  Here’s a little story for you.

We nicely invited her to my sister’s baby shower.  She shows up at my mother’s house and as she’s walking in, she notices that there are chickens in our yard and asks my sister’s boyfriend’s mother if she brought her chickens with her.  She was dead serious.  (Yes, Mildew, this woman loaded up her chickens and brought them on over!)

So she goes inside and wants to see the house.  My mother in law takes her for the short tour and brings her down stairs to my sister’s place.  My sister was down there with her friends just talking.  Mildew interrupts (as she does all the time) and goes “I just want you girls to know that I talked to my woman doctor and if you are having some personal dryness, you can rub some olive oil on your woman parts!  It’s really helped me with some dryness and irritation since my hysterectomy”

Silence.  The room went completely silent and I had to leave because I was about to pee my pants I was holding in my laughter.

So there you have it, in a pinch, you can use oil on your vajay.

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One Comment leave one →
  1. Gramma S permalink
    July 15, 2010 10:54 am

    Alright…so now we have a little history about “Mildew”. Yes, she is THAT bad! I think we should bring her some live chickens and just drop them off at her doorstep! She would probably get the olive oil out! And I don’t mean to cook the chickens!!!

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